Self-care for nonprofit leaders
When I think about running a small shop, I wish I could say it was all sunshine and cozy cups of coffee. There is definitely a lot of that. But there’s the overwhelmed and overworked side too. And that's a lot harder to talk about.
I now recognize the signs that I'm burning out, but a few years ago, I had no idea how to break the cycle. I realized I wasn’t taking care of myself. I wasn’t setting boundaries. I was saying yes to everything.
And that’s the norm for nonprofit leaders.
In the nonprofit world, self-care is seen as a luxury. You’re expected to work essentially for free. Because you care about what you do. But what happens when you’re underpaid and overextended?
Often, it means burning out. Or leaving the field all together. And the numbers back this up: the nonprofit turnover rate is 19%.
So what’s a nonprofit executive director to do? Take the afternoon off for a massage? Buy a pastry every now and then? HA! I wish it were that simple.
Why is self-care so hard?
Taking care of yourself is about protecting your mental and physical health. It’s about reigniting your energy for this work. It’s not a two-hour fix.
Self-care is not pretty
Last year, as I was cleaning out some boxes, I found a gift card.
You see, my board of directors had given me this spa gift card that was more than my weekly take-home pay. Please don’t misinterpret this, I was extremely appreciative —I mean, hot stone massage. Yes, please.
So, WHYYYYYY did two years go by and I hadn’t used it?
Because it’s not what I needed. A gift card was not what my frazzle-mcdazzle executive director self needed.
But I didn’t know that.
Self-care as an executive director is not taking a personal day or getting a massage. Those are band-aids and not a real solution to what is really going on. Self-care is taking a deep, long look at your failures, your insecurities, and your doubts—and dealing with them.
5 ways to practice self-care as a small shop leader
Here’s how you really prevent burnout and build a sustainable nonprofit.
1 ➜ Build a support network
Create a committee for the work that you can no longer do. Recruit and train volunteers to take care of some of the items on your to-do list. Hire a virtual assistant. You can’t stay on the DIY train forever. Lean on your network.
2 ➜ Lead a hard conversation
Is there one bottleneck board member? You know—the kind who stops every project before it begins. Or has seven negative opinions for every suggestion.Self-care is getting the courage to ask a toxic board member to leave the board.
3 ➜ Invest in your professional development
Stop with the sleepless nights from November 27th to January 1st. Invest in a course on writing a direct mail appeal, so you can raise more money and share your year-end campaign with confidence. Or get your donor stewardship in order by taking an actionable stewardship workshop.
4 ➜ Admit when you need help
Maybe it’s time to finally raise your hand. Share that you don’t know how to read your organization’s financial statements. Be brave and get the help you need to be more fiscally-minded.
5 ➜ Accept you can’t be perfect
Accept that you can’t be all things to all people. You will disappoint someone and you’re going to screw up sometimes. That’s ok. You are human. And there is real courage in acknowledging your faults and failures—and still showing up again and again, trying to do better every day.
How to create a healthy nonprofit culture
As an executive director of staff or volunteers, it’s your responsibility to set an example and create a healthy culture. It starts with you. Here are a few techniques I’ve learned along the way.
1 ➜ Get organized. (But, seriously organized!)
Being disorganized takes up a lot of energy; figure out your organizational system.
Maybe it’s a planner or how to take notes, manage your to-do lists, or organize your files on your computer desktop. By having a process in place and being organized, you are freeing up brain space on how things are supposed to work and allowing you to focus on the work.
2 ➜ Brain to paper!
Write it down. All the things. But especially the things you don’t want to face. Put them somewhere that you have to look every day. Then, start to tackle them one by one.
3 ➜ Spark joy
Flashback to the Marie Kondo method for a minute. Keep what sparks joy and eliminate what doesn’t.
Do donor calls and thank you letters spark joy? Or is your process too clunky and overwhelming? (If so, grab your 100 Day Donor Experience Roadmap to make donor relationships easy).
Start taking inventory of what you do on a daily or weekly basis. Does it bring you joy? If not, is it something that you can stop doing or do you need to change your attitude or perspective? I’m not saying you can cancel all board meetings because they don’t bring you joy, but you can identify why you’re struggling with them.
Side note—I love how Brooke Battle at Swell Fundraising talks about decluttering in your nonprofit. She shares some great tips!
4 ➜ Learn to say no!
Early in my career as an Executive Director, I was trying to drink from a fire hose. As you can imagine, it did not go well. A mentor told me that my number one job as an ED was to say no. It might be a hard no or it might be a “No, not yet.” Those words changed my whole perspective.
You cannot be all things to all people, so get comfortable saying no. And in case no one has told you, it’s ok to say no and set boundaries and limits. But do it and then own it.
5 ➜ The Essentials
Sleep. Eat. Water. Move.
Sleep is essential. Without it, I’m unfocused, decisions are harder to make and I am not doing my best work. Get up early or stay up late, pick one. I’m an early bird and get most of my work done in the first several hours of the day. I know this and make it a priority to go to sleep early.
Water. You know this. I know this. Why is this so hard? HALF YOUR BODY WEIGHT IN OUNCES. That’s how much water you need to drink in a day! Anyone else try and survive only on just coffee? It may last a few days or get you through a big project, but just like sleep, I get irritable, jittery and I am definitely not focused.
Eat. Licking the bag of potato chips when you’re working late does not scream taking care of yourself. Find foods that fuel your body. Scheduling meal prep as part of your regular routine will change your life.
Movement. You can walk, run, zumba, yoga or ribbon dance, but I can guarantee you will have significantly more energy when you work movement into your schedule.
Regardless, if it’s sleep, water, exercise or taking your vitamins, make yourself a priority. You have one body. Be nice to it.
Lead by example
When you make self-care a priority, your team will take notice. Start with one small step today.
And keep making a difference in your corner of the world. You got this!
Want to learn how to reclaim your time as an executive director?
Follow Sprout - THE podcast for small shop nonprofits.